Intermarriage How-To for Rabbis

Intermarriage How-To for Rabbis

Many rabbis wish to serve couples who are intermarrying, but they find they have not received enough training or guidance on how to do this, staying true to their Jewish values and serving a diverse Jewish future. This workshop will be an opportunity to learn from rabbis with decades of experience with intermarrying families.

DATE AND TIME: Thursday, April 11, Noon to 1:30pm (Eastern)
FORMAT: Webex or Zoom Internet Video Conference, TBD
COST: $54


Rabbi Adam Chalom, Dean for North America of the International Institute for Secular Humanistic Judaism and Rabbi of Kol Hadash Humanistic Congregation in north suburban Chicago. He has officiated over 330 weddings in the past 20 years, most of them intermarriages.

Rabbi Denise Handlarski, Rabbi of Oraynu Congregation for Humanistic Judaism in Toronto, Canada and founder of In addition to having officiated at several intermarriage ceremonies, Rabbi Handlarski is inter-married herself. She is currently writing The A-Z of Intermarriage.


  • What are Interfaith and Intercultural marriage ceremonies, and how are they different?
  • What are important conditions to consider regarding when and how to officiate (or co-officiate)?
  • How can we say “no” nicely, and how can we get to yes?
  • What works well to include other cultural/religious wedding traditions in the ceremony?
  • What are some of the pitfalls and positives of working with other clergy (for those who co-officiate)?
  • What are some common concerns couples express about their married future?
  • How best to manage concerned parents and in-laws?


Under the Chuppah: Rabbinic Officiation and Intermarriage (study by Brandeis University Cohen Center for Modern Jewish Studies, 2016)

Liberal Jewish Movement Statements

  • Conservative Judaism: Leadership Council Statement (1995), Intermarriage, Conversion & Patrilineal Jews (2014)
  • Reconstructing Judaism: Guidelines on Intermarriage (1983 and earlier)
  • Reform Judaism: Officiation at Mixed Marriages (1973) , Co-Officiation (1982)
  • Secular Humanistic Judaism: Intermarriage (1974), Co-Officiating (1982), Intermarriage (1991)
  • Jewish Renewal : Description at

Sample Intermarriage Wedding Information Booklet (distributed to registrants)

Recommended Reading List and materials to “go forth and learn” (distributed to registrants)

NOTE: This program will benefit rabbis who celebrate intermarriages from any denomination/philosophy. It will be focused on the how-tos' rather than a particular Jewish ideology—takhles [basics], not theology.